1/07/11 Frustration

I woke up yesterday morning to find the world had sneaked away during the night.

Instead of it’s vibrant hues and tones I was left with something unreal – something that just doesn’t exist.
Lou has been with me the past few days – she’ll be providing the guest blog of our time together.

Suffice is it to say it had been a hoot.

Back in the tent, I was trying to pluck up the courage to video my mental state at the time.

Not this time – not quite.

Lou, her sister and brother in law to be were going about their business while I kept going back into the shelter of my tent.

What I was hiding from and, just as interestingly, what a thin layer of canvas could protect me from, is anyone’s guess.

It’s always good to look at factors that may have precipitated the change in my state of mind.

I had a few guesses – the last few miles yesterday had been a bit stressful – we’d been walking on the main road with fast traffic that had felt positively aggressive.

My uncle Don, my mums brother, is currently lying in hospital very I’ll in ICU. He is the man who taught me all I needed to know about forgiveness. I’ve said all my good byes to him but…

I don’t know. Should I be down in England to be near him – near his family – or should I continue my quest? He was born in Wick, the last time I saw him I told him about all the sights and sounds that I’d seen when I was up there with the documentary makers.
He looked me in the eye over his oxygen mask. He mumbled some things in reply – I’m not sure if he understood me.

Lou had made the decision that there’d be no further walking today. She could see that faraway look in my eye and well, the rest is…

I phoned Ella for a bit of advice and guidance. She spoke to lou and together they developed a plan.
So, here I am back at the 2 lou’s with the lovely Ella – they’ve gone west for one of lou’s gigs.

Yesterday – Saturday the first of July – passed with Wimbledon, lager and Chinese food and great, great company.

You might not find that in any psychological journals.

No rush – just gentle hands.

The world has kindly come back.

Frustrated? I was.

Relaxed? I am.

Let’s see what tomorrow brings.

Walk a mile


This entry was posted in mental health, Uncategorized, walking and tagged , . Bookmark the permalink.

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